Fuck that lying little rodent called a groundhog. Predicting 6 more weeks of winter was absolute bullshit. What we have on our hands my friends is the spring. Flowers start to bloom, love is in the air, the heavy winter jackets fall prey to smaller lighter jackets of the same design. Old Italian guys who have 'vette convertibles start to lower the canvas a bit more often, showing off the trophy whore in the passenger's seat for all to see.

What I'm getting at here people is that the spring sucks. So does the fall for that matter. Who really needs a season to transition, I mean summer suits its purpose to be hot as fucking hell, and winter used to do its job, but nowadays I think it's going to get fired for being such a lazy season and just being cold without the white gold known as snow. Back to spring through, we as New Yorkers don't need those extra 2-3 months of "mild" temperatures to get ready for the hot of summer, no, fuck that.

I say summer comes directly after winter, that way hot chicks are in next to nothing bathing suits prancing around exciting all the guys that could never have the chance to see them wearing anything less. That dream will never come about on the island though, or at least not for another 30 years when global warming will really kick in and then not only will we have summer, we'll have it all year long and LI will be a giant sand bar.

Well maybe I havent been all that fair to the season of spring, so I'll say there is one positive aspect about it. In the spring time love is in the air, why? I guess it's because all other animals are trying to get their mating done so they can pop out their offspring in time so that they grow a little before winter. Well whatever is the cause, there is a surge of hormones in the air and it turns everyone into little Fuck-Bots. With the sole programmed role of having sex, yes, S------E------X. The 3 letter word that most parents tried to hide from us as children. The 3 letter word that if uttered could cause the entire middle school to go into a frenzy. Good old-fashioned fucking. The only problem that arises because of everyone being in heat is that 85% of teenagers in the high school arent getting their groove on. That 85% of people instead release their frustration by playing sports, watching movies(guys watch porno, girls watch chick flicks), and of course masturbation, because if someone else isnt gonna do it for you, you'd better do it yourself. Now most guys by this time will readily admit they do it, but girls on the other hand, well GIRLS ARE DIRTY ROTTEN SCOUNDRELS. They are worse liars than Enron executives.

Now stop reading this and go enjoy whatever you enjoy.