As you all know, on Tuesday, September 25th, we showed up at school only to find 1000 or so kids standing around outside. Why? Because of a gas leak in the L wing. The fire department, police, national guard, and motherfucking pentagon were called in. They took decisive action. And by "decisive action" I mean "spraying a bunch of water around inside the school". Everyone knows that water destroys natural gas. Around 9, us kids were starting to get restless (beating each other senseless, having sex in plain sight, etc.), so the school administration took a good careful look around inside the building and, not seeing any colorful clouds of gas floating around, declared the danger averted. Throughout the course of these events, Mr. Pam lost approximately 81 pounds by speed-waddling between the various masters to which he is a helpless tool. Before long, we all had to march back into the gas-filled school, to meet our certain deaths. By some stroke of luck, we did not meet said deaths. But dammit, we COULD HAVE. I mean, I'm not a graduate of Common Sense University, but even I wouldn't send over a thousand kids into a building with gas line problems.

Those wacky administrators! OROPALLO 4-EVA!!!!

rip